Ms-access – Advanced CSV export formatting in MS Access

You can certainly create a database such as you describe using Access, if that is what you want to do. I don't see any reason why it would not be feasible. If you want to include other relationships (tribe/clan/family), make those part of your logical data model at the start.

"Perfectly normalized" is a relative term. Normalize according to what you are trying to accomplish. 5th normal form probably isn't going to help in a reporting database where denormalized happens to be what is needed. What you need is a data model that matches what you plan to do with it. Define the entities and relationships in terms of the problems you need to solve. Normalize where needed, and denormalize where needed.

MS Access is OK, I guess, as a front-end GUI builder, if your expectations aren't too great. I've never worked with an Access application that was really well done. A few of them have looked impressive, but they were hard to use. I'm not saying that it is not possible to develop a good one, but I suspect that a lot of people give up before they arrive there.

Whenever I have tried to develop using Access I have run into an endless series of restrictions on what I could do. The SQL dialect itself has many limitations, and the VB programming environment is full of pitfalls. I haven't worked with it now for some years, and I don't know if it has moved on to VB.Net since then, but working with "On Error" in the versions I used was awful. If you are going to do everything in Access then you are probably going to be stuck doing GEDCOM imports and refreshes in VB.

On the other hand there are many things you can do with the forms features, if you know them well. If you don't, you may waste a lot of time trying to do things and failing because you didn't know the particular trick for that task. I say this as somebody that doesn't know all the tricks.

I would like to be able to import my data into a SQL database as well, in order to do queries against it that typical genealogy software does not do. I came across your question while looking to see what might already be out there.

I would be inclined to use SQL Server, because SQL Server development is what I do for a living. If you don't know it well, it can present a steep learning curve. But importing, refreshing, and exporting GEDCOM data is straightforward, if not especially easy, using Integration Services, standard reports can be created using Reporting Services (or even Report Builder), and I might even see possible applications for attribute management using Master Data Services. This is all on top of a powerful database engine, and all of these components are available in the Developer Edition for about the cost of a genealogy software package, if you don't count the time to develop the application, which could be quite a lot.

Personally, I don't have time to develop something like this right now, and I will keep on looking. Good luck.

Load the CSV file into a "staging" table. From there you can easily do the UPDATE/INSERT/DELETE in a single statement for each one

Something along the lines:

update real_table
  set ...
where exists (select 1 from staging_table where ...)

insert into ...
select 
from stage_table
  left join real_table 
where real_table.some_col is NULL

delete real_table
where not exists (select 1 from staging_table)

Then delete the data from the staging table.

Probably the fastest way to do it. The only drawback is that you have the data for one table twice in the database (until it is deleted from the staging table).