High Sierra – AddressBook Broken

Ok, so I've come across a (seemingly) common problem in High Sierra: annoying problems using Contacts.app/AddressBook (not sure why they don't just call it AddressBook.app, but that's irrelevant at this point).

For a while, I thought the problem was on my end. To isolate this, I deleted my AddressBook folder in it's entirety and restarted. Now, with a fresh (empty) AddressBook, I still am having the same problems: the app hangs and I can't add/search/edit/delete etc… Nothing. Unfortunately, I am unable to decode the .hang file – I don't have a ton experience in this area. That is to say, it's not giving me any relevant information that I can discern.

Lastly, I did the exact same thing (fresh, empty AddressBook) and then rebooted in Safe Mode. This did not resolve the problem.

I've poured over the logs within Console, to no avail. I can't seem to get a consistent error message of any kind, so not sure what path to pursue at this point. I've not tried Sysdiagnose, yet.

P.S. iCloud sync has been OFF for this whole process.

EDIT: Here are the three errors I get

1. AEGetDescData of non-desc type 'reco' not a good idea

2. Exception caught during decoding of received reply to message 'synchronousDonatedMeCard:', dropping incoming message and calling failure block.

    Exception: Exception while decoding argument 0 (#1 of invocation):
    <NSInvocation: 0x60800026db40>
    return value: {v} void
    target: {@?} 0x0 (block)
    argument 1: {@} 0x0

    Exception: value for key 'right' was of unexpected class 'NSError'. Allowed classes are '{(
        CNMutableContact,
        CNEither,
        CNContact
    )}'.

3. Error retrieving contacts from daemon: Error Domain=NSCocoaErrorDomain Code=4101 "connection to service named com.apple.contacts.donation.agent" UserInfo={NSDebugDescription=connection to service named com.apple.contacts.donation.agent}